Whether you are easily distracted, lazy or just can’t be bothered, procrastination is something most of us are familiar with- some more so than others. A 2014 study estimated that 1/5 of adults and half of all students procrastinate. That’s a lot of procrastination going on there! Sometimes, you wonder why you torture yourself with all that stress, but you just can’t seem to change your habits.
1. People don’t understand why you simply just don’t start the task earlier. You can’t help it if inspiration only strikes at the last hour!
2. Nothing is “too late” for you. At least, that’s what you keep telling yourself.
3. You go through an endless loop of steadily increasing stress as the deadline approaches, guilt, worry, and self-doubt.
4. When deadlines roll around, you coop yourself up in your room in an attempt to be productive.
5. Not that it works, of course. You’re probably on Facebook stalking your ex, your ex’s current partner, enviously scrolling through your friend’s vacation pictures in Spain, aimlessly refreshing your feed in hope of new notifications.
6. You then decide to make a list of things you want to do during the holidays after all the deadlines and exams are over. You even start looking at flight prices and hotel locations.
7. Bedtime is now fair game at any time of the day. You wake up at 5pm, have breakfast at 6pm, lunch at 10pm. Who knows anymore.
8. You check your phone every few minutes. It is absolutely vital your friends and family do not feel neglected while you complete your arduous task, after all.
9. You make a cup of tea every half-hour because tea is necessary sustenance. Also, having twice as many pee breaks gives you a convenient excuse to avoid doing your work. You can’t hold back natural bodily processes! It’s bad for your body!
10. You decide to make a small snack, and it becomes a five-course meal. COOK ALL THE THINGS!
11. You spend half an hour making a list of all the things you need to do. You feel productive, and decide to take a quick nap before starting on the first task. You wake up three hours later. Whoops.
12. You refuse to start work at odd times of the day. You tell yourself you will start studying at 8pm, but when 8pm comes and goes, you know you can’t start at 8.11pm. The travesty! No, you will start at 8.30pm. Or maybe 9pm, just to be sure.
13. Your workspace looks like a tornado decided to swallow the contents, and regurgitate them again. After storming through it a few times. Violently. You snap a photo for posterity and put it on Instagram to show everyone how hardworking you are. #work #studying #stressed #help
14. You decide the mess is what is killing your productivity and decide to clean it up.
15. You decide to clean out your wardrobe at the same time. Yay for cleanliness!
16. You realise you have hardly any clothes you want to wear, and you’ve spent two hours cleaning your room, so you obviously deserve a small online shopping break.
17. How is it midnight already?! You’ve only written the title of the essay and your name.
18. You text your friends to reassure yourself it’s “not just me” and bond over your shared misery. Two of your friends have already completed the assignment, another is on the last paragraph, and another one is halfway through.
19. You have a mini panic attack.
20. You ring your BFF and cry over how useless you are- and after you have calmed down you start gossiping because interpersonal relations are important and assignments only last awhile but friendship is forever. Duh.
21. You start Googling things like “how to be more productive”, “how to stop myself from getting distracted”.
22. You decide to have a can of cider to relax, because you’re stressed out and you can’t work while being stressed out, can you?
23. You start getting sleepy, so you decide to take a quick shower to freshen up. And exfoliate. And do your nails, because they are gross and chipped. And put on a face mask.
24. You start wondering if it’s too late to join your friends on that night out, because you’ve done nothing all day anyway. You end up not going, because you’re in your tatty hoodie and fluffy socks and you just can’t be bothered getting dressed to go out.
25. You give up and start watching Netflix instead since you can’t possibly work this late, can you? You’ll start tomorrow, for sure.
26. You attempt to sleep with your notes beside you or under your pillow. You don’t really think diffusion works, but no harm trying, right?
27. You manage to scrape through the deadline by the skin of your teeth. You feel like there is a typo in the last paragraph somewhere or a chapter you forgot to study, but you can’t be bothered anymore.
28. You tell yourself you’ll start early next time. You know you won’t.